Spin-off: Four Demonly Kings
Part 2 of: Arare arc
The ice-spitting rabbit creature is in a serious crisis and needs the Demonly Kings' help, even if he disdains them.
And so the Four Demonly Kings sat round the tea table in RC 381 to hear Mr. Usuasagi tell his story. Kaguya was clearly more annoyed than the rest, all while keeping a calm face – he was sure not to forget the gaping holes in his elaborate waloli outfit in the near future – but this didn't much bother the rabbit, who smirked at him.
Then the rabbit saw the starry gaze Inasuke was giving him, and his facial expression quickly turned into a scowl.
"Ya wanna tell us sumthin', huh Usagi?" Urato said. "Hurry da heck up. We ain't got time fer yer nonsense."
The rabbit snapped at him. "It's Usuasagi! U-su-a-sa-gi! As in the pale shade of blue! Five morae! If you don't want an icy hell, don't butcher my clan name!" after a deep breath, he continued in a calmer voice, "I've neglected to properly introduce myself: I am Usuasagi Arare 薄浅葱霰, current head of the Usuasagi clan. We're revered as the most powerful, most formidable clan among the yukinbo race."
"A what now?" Urato asked.
After barely audible mutters of foolish humans, the rabbit resumed, "We're yōkai with snow and ice powers. Our men are called yukinbo 雪坊, and our women are called yuki-onna 雪女. This ever-damned rabbit-like body isn't even my true form; we all turn into this cursed form whenever our energy runs low. Those ice spikes I threw at you, they cost about a third of my energy already."
Kaguya's gaze grew even colder from the reminder. However, before he could get a word in, Momoka said, "That's all very unfortunate, but Kaguya-sama's expensive clothes are ruined. What are you going to do about it?"
"That garb of his?" Arare sneered. "Why should I feel sorry for his ruined clothes when it's him who desecrates the garments from Princess Kaguya's era? Besides, he backhanded me first – though, I must admit he's got a powerful hand. I like you already, Munehisa."
Kaguya was aghast. "Please do not use my tea name in such a manner. Besides, how do you know my tea name?"
Arare grinned menacingly. "Firstly, I refuse to refer to a puny human by the name of the one and only Princess Kaguya. Secondly, I've learned a lot more about you from that single slap than you think. The feel of your hand, the force… it could only have come from a well-heeled heir to a clan, skilled in whisking tea and dolling himself up. Do you want me to tell you more things I've learned?"
Kaguya said, looking away, "Excuse me, we now have urgent matters to attend to. Everyone, let's go."
The Four Demonly Kings were still sitting at the table – now encased in large snowballs as if they were snowmen, complete with blue carrot-shaped cones over their noses. "Man, it's so warm," Inasuke said. "It's much cuter than the daruma suits we had to wear last time too!"
They had no choice but to keep listening to the rabbit's rambling. "Foolish humans, making me waste even more energy. While I very much enjoy a good backhand, all the stuff I learned about you horrified me big time, kid. I've never seen anything so unbelievably reprehensible."
"You really are a pervert," Kaguya said.
"Humans do get more and more insolent day by day," Arare continued, ignoring him. "Not only do they blithely name their children after the moon princess, they also see it fit to call one of their own an Ogre King, the Vermilion Bird. You really no longer have any respect, any fear for demons and gods, do you?
"That is a big problem for us. We yukinbo derive our spiritual energy from human fear. The chill running down your backs, we turn that into snow and ice. We need that power to keep our villages cold and keep us alive… but that has been changing. As humans' fear of deadly cold diminishes, so do our powers. Little by little, our settlements shrink, our people turn into rabbits, our numbers dwindle. At this rate, the yukinbo race would die out if I don't manage to find a way for us to be scary again."
"Then… why are you here? How's the PPC supposed to help make you scary?" Inasuke asked.
"My good friend, the tengu Oshimo, heard much about you and told me about you before she came here. Apparently, you deal with the scariest creatures of all: Mary Sues and badfic ghosts. They supposedly warp and break entire universes just to suit them, they can turn every creature into their slaves. Oshimo wants to research them to find the secret to eternal beauty, but I want to inspire the same sense of terror as they do."
Right then, RC 381's console beeped, accompanied by the same noise coming from wherever RC 🤘's doorway felt like being that day. No more was said.
